I am so beyond thrilled with how our engagement photos turned out! We had them taken on October 25th 2014. Surprisingly, it was about 75 degrees that day - which is extraordinarily warm for Indiana in late October. We were actually a bit over dressed for the weather (I was very hot and sweaty, there I said it). However the following Friday was Halloween and it SNOWED, so it just goes to show you how no one can "depend" on the weather.
We hired our photographer all the way back in April of 2014. I had met her and her husband at a local bridal show my mother and I went to on a whim. Her personality and mine just clicked and I had a feeling she would be a great fit for us. I had already met with two previous photographers who just did not work out at all. I must admit I was a bit nervous about choosing a photographer because I did not want to pick someone who I felt was not on the same page as myself and my fiance. This was what led us to choose Krisandra Adams. I am not going to lie, I knew I was going to hire Krisandra from the moment I met her. She came across as fun, quirky, and confident. I also liked that she specialized in boudoir photography but did weddings as well. Why did this matter to me? The way I felt about it was if she was comfortable taking photographs of women in their most intimate state then I felt she could capture the honest emotion of our wedding. I also adore that her husband is her second wedding shooter and right hand assistant.
Part of our wedding package included an engagement session. Deep down inside I wanted these engagement photos more than I can possibly describe. Prior to this photo session, every - single - picture of myself and my fiance together are of us in Halloween costumes or we are being silly. In other words, they are not pictures I can give to my family to have framed for the mantle. Our engagement session gave us 57 - yes 57 amazing pictures of the two of us being "us".
I know a lot of couples like to have multiple wardrobe changes for their engagement, shoot but for us this made zero sense. I mean think about it; wouldn't you agree that it looks "off" when you see a couple very dressed up standing in the middle of a field? This does not happen naturally so it just ends up looking like you got lost on the way to dinner. We had a discussion of what "kinds" of photos we would want taken. I provided three options: We could do a really dressed up shoot but have them taken at the theater or a museum - something appropriate for "fancy" attire. We could go casual and have them taken at the park where we spend most of our time. Or, we could go 100% hockey fanatic and have pics taken at the ice rink ON the ice. We decided the park setting would best represent us and be the nicest setting for the photographs.
Given our choice of having the photos taken at Mounds Park we mutually decided to wear something we would normally wear if we went hiking. I told my fiance that I was going to wear jeans but it was NOT decided that we would both be wearing plaid shirts. This happened by chance and I am really glad it did. Wearing plaid allowed us to be "casual" without going too casual, but most importantly we did not look out of place in our natural setting. This was extremely important because as you can see, we were photographed standing in a wet area and sitting on rough surfaces - if I had been in a dress and heels we would have had many photo opportunities lost. Keep in mind your photographer might have you sit on wood or rocks or lean up against something rough like bricks, so make sure you are mindful not to wear something that will easily snag. You also might be asked to straddle something or lay on a bench which might be awkward if you are in a short skirt.
We did bring one change of shirts - we brought our personalized hockey jerseys. I asked my fiance if he wanted to do this for the sake of having save the date cards made - it would have both our names on it and be "cute". Well of course he was on board and already knew he was going to wear his Canadiens jersey...As it turned out we received several GREAT pictures of us in our jerseys even though it looked a bit "out of place" for the setting.
Aside from me taking off my vest for the last 10 or so pictures we did not complicate things by using props, changing clothes, or being in a setting where we would have to wait for the "right moment" to have a photograph taken. Given my experience I will offer a few tips for other brides to be to ponder if they are considering an engagement session.
1.) I think if it is offered, you should absolutely do an engagement session. It is not just about having pictures to give to family (even though that is always nice) it is about having that crucial "trial run" with your photographer so you can iron out any questions or concerns. It also gives you an idea of how you will look in pictures using the methods your photographer will choose - not all photographers use the same techniques or even editing styles.
2.) It will be awkward. Having someone tell you to pose or be candid is weird - bottom line. Having someone tell you to "kiss and hold the pose" will make you laugh. We have several amazing pictures of us laughing at each other trying to look "lovey" while struggling to not to fall off slippery rocks into the creek below. That being said, just roll with it. Digital cameras allow photographers to take a zillion pictures so who cares if they get a couple of "duds" or funny faces.
3.) Wear clothing you are comfortable in and shoes conducive for the terrain. My fiance had mesh topped shoes on and his feet got wet when we took pictures near the water. My boots were leather - and yes my feet were a bit wet as well. However, that is much better than trying to walk across wet rocks in pumps and dress shoes. We also ended up walking about half of the main trail to "follow the sun" and get the best pictures. I feel like my feet would have been near death if I had worn heels. If it looks like it might rain, purchase an umbrella just in case. The same holds true for jackets and sweaters; if it is cold you don't necessarily need to look bundled up at all times. Take a coat that you can wear between location shoots. I had on a leather vest that had to come off by the end of the shoot because I was so hot.
4.) Take a hairbrush and your makeup kit with you. I did not do this and I really wish I had. My hair is naturally very thin and wispy. It was so humid that day my hair just went everywhere about half way through the shoot. Furthermore I started the shoot out wearing a pink lip gloss. It gave me the perfect amount of color without overdoing it. But again, half way through the shoot it had faded and I looked washed out n a few photos. This can of course be corrected with photo editing software, but I was bummed that I looked so pale in a few great pictures. I was very pleased that I splurged and used L'Oreal Face Primer for the first time. I did not have to mess with my foundation or anything the whole shoot and we were out in the woods for almost 2 hours. Just a little bit of that stuff went a long way and it really did give me a "flawless" finish. I also felt like powder set better as well. I would use the product again.
5.) In speaking of makeup, be mindful of the colors you choose. I have dark brown eyes so I usually have some wild color of eyeshadow on - green, blue, purple, two sometimes three colors. Yea. I wore my "usual" bright green eyeshadow and damn, it is green. Just - so - green. After I saw the pictures I thought to myself that it looked really out of place because it was "too done". It would have been okay if I was in a black cocktail dress but not walking in the park. I should have gone with a shimmery champagne or light brown to "match" the setting. Like I said before, this was a great trial run for me and at least now I know for the wedding I will need to go neutral with the eye, use fake lashes for subtle drama instead, and go with a long lasting lip stain instead of a gloss. I would not have been aware of any of this if I had not seen it in my engagement pictures. My fiance obviously did not have this problem - he wore a blue shirt to match his blue eyes and he looks great in all the pictures :)
6.) Do not be afraid to suggest a pose or ask your photographer to take a picture of something specific if it means something to you. My fiance and I have a habit of patting each other on the rear and making a joke on how it "ranks" with other pats. So, I asked our photographer to take a picture of us with his hand on my bum. I love the picture because you can see my ring, and it is a cute pic without being too crass.
7.) Do not rely on, fret about, or go overboard on props. I know right now props are very popular: The Mr. and Mrs. signs, the metal or wood "&" sign, balloons, various banners with dates, chalkboard anything, pennants, etc. It seems like every engagement picture I have seen in the last three years features some kind of prop. I too was initially on board with props but I changed my mind. I was dead set on having something with our wedding date on it but I decided against it just in case for some reason we would need to change the date of our wedding or something in the future. After all, we had our engagement photos taken almost a year before the wedding. Additionally, the props will change in style or go away all together in the future - they are a fad - and fads ultimately date photographs. The same holds true for "themed photo shoots" (Great Gatsby anyone?) so I wanted something more timeless.
8.) Be prepared if something weird happens. You might be wondering what this could possibly entail. Well...when we were having our pictures taken down by the water a group of women must have thought we were celebrities. As we were leaning on a tree trying not to fall into the White River, a group of three women stopped on the trail, pulled out their phones, and began recording us and taking pictures. They stood there for almost 10 minutes. It was so bizarre the photographer commented that she has never had this happen before. I am not suggesting something like this is common but be prepared to be approached by animals, get pooped on by a bird, step in mud up to your calf, have to wait for people to move or pass to get a shot in a "high traffic area", have people ask you what you are doing, etc.
9.) Most importantly, have fun! Even if you are nervous, feel awkward, or have never had professional pictures taken before do not let your insecurities get the best of you in photos because it will show if you do. This can be combated by possibly doing a trial run with your fiance at home in your living room to get an idea of how you can pose together, try to mimic a picture you found on Pinterest, and do not make any "major changes" or wear uncomfortable clothes. If you do not usually wear a lot of makeup, do not go overboard. I say this because you will worry about how it looks the whole time and ultimately you will not look like yourself if you never wear makeup otherwise. You do not want to be unrecognizable in your own engagement photographs! I would also suggest wearing something you already own and you know you look good wearing. You don't want to buy a new blouse only to find out after the fact you can see through it when it is photographed or buy a sweater and wear the wrong bra that ends up showing a bunch lumps you never knew existed.
This past weekend my mother and I attended the Indy Bridal Show & Wedding Expo at the Ritz Charles. I had no idea what to expect because this was the first bridal show I had ever been too. I guess I more or less expected it to be like a flea market - a lot of people milling around collecting items and so fourth. However, the atmosphere was totally different than what you get at a flea market and there were some challenges we ran into along the way.
Here are some tips for you to consider when you go to your first bridal show!
First off, we had a difficult time locating the venue for the show. For some reason, I was under the impression that the Ritz Charles was a hotel - when in fact it is a wedding venue that you can rent out in Carmel, Indiana. It was tucked away in a business building lot off Meridian - the snow and road construction was challenging as well. Anyway, we got there about an hour after the event began and they were PACKED. Not only was the lot almost totally full, but you could hardly walk inside. I would suggest you try to arrive at the show/expo as soon as they open to avoid massive crowds.
This venue had a coat check and although it was only 15 degrees out and we had to walk clear across the parking lot, I wished about 20 minutes in I would have checked my coat. With that many people milling around it was about 80 degrees in there and I was about to melt into a puddle. Not only was my puffy coat cumbersome, but I also had my massive purse and my professional camera with me. So, I was so weighted down that it was very difficult to move around and take items being passed out. I would suggest you wear a light jacket and brave the cold because the venue will be quite warm if it is crowded. You might want to also opt for a cross-body shoulder bag for ease of moving in a crowd.
Be prepared to answer questions! Every vendor you encounter will ask you if you have a date set, a venue, a caterer, a theme, a photographer, a budget, a head count, etc. Even if that is not what the vendor offers, they will ask you to ascertain if you still need services they do offer. For me, it was hard because we are doing two ceremonies - one this year and one next year. The one this year will only require a cake and photographer, but the one next year will need everything. It was interesting overhearing some conversations between other brides and vendors - most vendors were booked for this year so basically unless you were planning a wedding for the following year, they likely would not be able to help you. I would suggest when you go to these expos and shows that you take a list with you of services or items you do need for your wedding, that way the vendor attendants can better assist you.
Take an extra bag with you for ALL the cards, brochures, flyers, coupons, etc. you will be receiving! We were SO laden down with stuff after the first 15-20 vendors we had to stop to scoop up a bag being handed out by Men's Warehouse to hold all the stuff! In speaking of all the adverts you will receive, keep a pen in hand to write down what you liked or disliked about a particular vendor! We thought about this and had a plan to write down information on the backs of business cards, but we were so overwhelmed so quickly that we forgot to notate some of the cards. This will become a problem if you really liked one vendor and particularly disliked another...I ran into this problem and it is a bit embarrassing.
One caterer offered a sample of this cheese spread that was to DIE for - oh my it was delicious and I am considering ordering it for my wedding...However, I mixed their card up with another caterer that offered a particularly unappetizing sample. It took me 30 minutes of searching online to figure out who was who by scouring menus. You might also want to make sure you make a notation on things you disliked in case a friend, bridesmaid, or family member eagerly suggests one of those vendors at some point in time so you can quickly say, "you already met with that vendor" and decided against them. No one has to know your "meeting" with that vendor consisted of tasting or viewing a sample at a bridal show. But, showing you have knowledge will create a respectable buffer between you and the person touting a vendor you were not very fond of.
Be prepared to receive a dozen or more e-mails less than a day after you attend the event from every - single - vendor for which you filled out a raffle ticket or contest. One of the main reasons brides go to these expos is to register to win amazing prizes and contests. I would probably die if I won a free photo shoot, custom invitations, or candy bar station. However, by signing up for these kinds of things you are being added into their mailing list. I did not think about this at all when I gave my "normal" e-mail address instead of giving my "resume" address. The reason why I did not give my lesser used e-mail was because if I did win a prize, I would want to know as soon as possible. I know I would have forgotten to check my alternate e-mails and in doing so, I might have missed out on a prize. I actually did not sign up for any contests for travel prizes for this very reason. In 2011 or 2012, I signed up for a free trip at a hockey game and for over a year they would randomly call my cell phone wanting me to buy a time share or some other damn thing I don't want.
Have a plan in mind of what to tell EVERYONE who offers a service that you either have already booked, cannot afford, do not need, or do not like! This is somewhat of a peeve for me - I do not want to come across as being snooty - or cheap, but remain polite in letting someone down. I know how easy it is at things like expos to upturn your nose at a particular vendor. But, you can just come across as being a total queen bee, and I do not want to come across that way. For example, I love professional flower arrangements but I already know I will not be able to afford them for my wedding. My brother is actually going to grow many of the flowers for me in his backyard, and any supplementary flowers that are needed I will be purchasing from the grocery store. So, when the florists were trying to woo me I quickly said that my wonderful brother, the gardener, would be providing the flowers.
For some reason if you say a family member or close friend will be providing a service, the vendors will drop the subject. Whereas if you "ho-hum" on the subject they will continue their pitch and you may feel uncomfortable. We were cornered by some gentlemen who were trying to peddle live bands and DJs. The music aspect of the wedding I am totally leaving up to my fiance because quite frankly, it is something that is not important to me at all and it is something I know nothing about (acoustics, PA systems, speakers, what?). When I accidentally let it slip that the reason why it was up to my fiance was because we probably could not afford anything fancy, they were quick to produce more literature on their "affordable packages and discounts". I was really at a loss for words, so I felt compelled to discuss music packages with these people as to not be rude - since I did open the door in regards to affordability. You have to think the only reason the vendors are there is to drum up business. The only reasons why I was there was to get ideas, register for prizes, and taste free cake.
The Verdict:
As a bride-to-be I plan on going to EVERY bridal show and expo I possibly can! Why? It is honestly silly not to! Think about it...bridal shows offer prizes for products and services you will likely need for your wedding. So, it's not like you are signing up to win a humungous pig smoker at a Colts game that won't even fit though your fence gate. You are signing up to win things like a $500 engagement photo package, $200 worth of gourmet cupcakes, $1000 towards rings, free tux rentals for the groomsmen, and so on. The prizes offered at bridal shows are good prizes and the odds are in your favor. Unless you are a bride, groom, or mother/father of either party you cannot sign up for prizes. Therefore, the contestant pool is automatically very limited so you really do have a very good chance at winning a prize. It also helps to take your fiance with you! In the sea of women I saw on Sunday, I saw only 3 grooms. But, if you take your man with you, you BOTH can register separately. I am taking my fiance with me to the bridal show happening this Sunday so we can taste cake from a local baker together. If your future husband balks at the idea of going to a wedding expo with you - just mention the free food and cake and he will be all about it!
To fully take advantage of bridal shows, it is best to start looking at expo schedules right after you get engaged so you can go to as many as possible. Shows provide great booths to glean ideas or determine costs. Expos are also a great way for a couple to start putting together a budget as well if they really do not have an idea of where to start. For me, I was curious about invitations because I was dead set on making my own. However, I did want to know if it would be cheaper to have them made for me - trust me it is cheaper to make your own...Cake was another thing I was in the air about. I am not a big sweets eater and I am not very keen on cake. Well, after consuming the most delicious piece of confectionery I have ever eaten in my life at the bridal show I am rethinking my initial plan - which was to get sheet cakes from Marsh.
Bridal shows and expos are designed to be fun outings for brides, grooms, and their families. So go without a set plan, and plan on spending about 1-2 hours at the expo depending on how many vendors are there. Wear comfortable shoes and breathable fabrics. Have a thought on things you really might need ideas on and know what will be automatic "passes". My automatic passes were on travel and for limo/carriage services because I already knew I would not need these services. Prepare to offer your contact information for things you might want to discuss with a vendor later on and understand you will need to provide e-mail addresses and phone numbers to register for prizes. If you run into an overly enthusiastic vendor, be prepared to say the following:
And no, none of these are true but it would be funny...
"My brother, the English gardener, will be providing the flowers."
"My father's cousin was related to Ansel Adams and he will be taking our photographs."
"My grandmother worked for MGM and was a consultant with Helen Rose who made Grace Kelly's dress. She will be making mine from antique lace as well."
"We are getting my aunt on loan from Wolfgang Puck to create a massive culinary spread."
"My fiance is a model for Tom Ford couture, so the tuxedos should look okay."
"Sorry, we do not need a limousine, my uncle is flying us to the venue in his helicopter."
"Oh, the bridesmaids will actually be wearing suits and ties and the groomsmen will be in dresses! Won't that be funny!?"
"You know that show Cake Wars? Well one of those shows was done for us to see who would be making the cake."
"We actually will not be serving food on plates. We will be using a slingshot from across the room and people will take turns receiving air delivered appetizers - very avant garde and on trend for 2015."
"The wedding will take place in the lake - not on the lake but actually in it - guests will be seated in inner-tubes"
"We trained 100 carrier pigeons to deliver the invitations to save money on postage."
"We will not need salon services because all the ladies will be wearing Bride of Frankenstein wigs."
Given our choice of having the photos taken at Mounds Park we mutually decided to wear something we would normally wear if we went hiking. I told my fiance that I was going to wear jeans but it was NOT decided that we would both be wearing plaid shirts. This happened by chance and I am really glad it did. Wearing plaid allowed us to be "casual" without going too casual, but most importantly we did not look out of place in our natural setting. This was extremely important because as you can see, we were photographed standing in a wet area and sitting on rough surfaces - if I had been in a dress and heels we would have had many photo opportunities lost. Keep in mind your photographer might have you sit on wood or rocks or lean up against something rough like bricks, so make sure you are mindful not to wear something that will easily snag. You also might be asked to straddle something or lay on a bench which might be awkward if you are in a short skirt. 
