Engagement Pictures: Tips and more!

I am so beyond thrilled with how our engagement photos turned out! We had them taken on October 25th 2014. Surprisingly, it was about 75 degrees that day - which is extraordinarily warm for Indiana in late October. We were actually a bit over dressed for the weather (I was very hot and sweaty, there I said it). However the following Friday was Halloween and it SNOWED, so it just goes to show you how no one can "depend" on the weather. 

We hired our photographer all the way back in April of 2014. I had met her and her husband at a local bridal show my mother and I went to on a whim. Her personality and mine just clicked and I had a feeling she would be a great fit for us. I had already met with two previous photographers who just did not work out at all. I must admit I was a bit nervous about choosing a photographer because I did not want to pick someone who I felt was not on the same page as myself and my fiance. This was what led us to choose Krisandra Adams. I am not going to lie, I knew I was going to hire Krisandra from the moment I met her. She came across as fun, quirky, and confident. I also liked that she specialized in boudoir photography but did weddings as well. Why did this matter to me? The way I felt about it was if she was comfortable taking photographs of women in their most intimate state then I felt she could capture the honest emotion of our wedding. I also adore that her husband is her second wedding shooter and right hand assistant. 

Part of our wedding package included an engagement session. Deep down inside I wanted these engagement photos more than I can possibly describe. Prior to this photo session, every - single - picture of myself and my fiance together are of us in Halloween costumes or we are being silly. In other words, they are not pictures I can give to my family to have framed for the mantle. Our engagement session gave us 57 - yes 57 amazing pictures of the two of us being "us". 

I know a lot of couples like to have multiple wardrobe changes for their engagement, shoot but for us this made zero sense. I mean think about it; wouldn't you agree that it looks "off" when you see a couple very dressed up standing in the middle of a field? This does not happen naturally so it just ends up looking like you got lost on the way to dinner. We had a discussion of what "kinds" of photos we would want taken. I provided three options: We could do a really dressed up shoot but have them taken at the theater or a museum - something appropriate for "fancy" attire. We could go casual and have them taken at the park where we spend most of our time. Or, we could go 100% hockey fanatic and have pics taken at the ice rink ON the ice. We decided the park setting would best represent us and be the nicest setting for the photographs.

Given our choice of having the photos taken at Mounds Park we mutually decided to wear something we would normally wear if we went hiking. I told my fiance that I was going to wear jeans but it was NOT decided that we would both be wearing plaid shirts. This happened by chance and I am really glad it did. Wearing plaid allowed us to be "casual" without going too casual, but most importantly we did not look out of place in our natural setting. This was extremely important because as you can see, we were photographed standing in a wet area and sitting on rough surfaces - if I had been in a dress and heels we would have had many photo opportunities lost. Keep in mind your photographer might have you sit on wood or rocks or lean up against something rough like bricks, so make sure you are mindful not to wear something that will easily snag. You also might be asked to straddle something or lay on a bench which might be awkward if you are in a short skirt.

We did bring one change of shirts - we brought our personalized hockey jerseys. I asked my fiance if he wanted to do this for the sake of having save the date cards made - it would have both our names on it and be "cute". Well of course he was on board and already knew he was going to wear his Canadiens jersey...As it turned out we received several GREAT pictures of us in our jerseys even though it looked a bit "out of place" for the setting.

Aside from me taking off my vest for the last 10 or so pictures we did not complicate things by using props, changing clothes, or being in a setting where we would have to wait for the "right moment" to have a photograph taken. Given my experience I will offer a few tips for other brides to be to ponder if they are considering an engagement session.

1.) I think if it is offered, you should absolutely do an engagement session. It is not just about having pictures to give to family (even though that is always nice) it is about having that crucial "trial run" with your photographer so you can iron out any questions or concerns. It also gives you an idea of how you will look in pictures using the methods your photographer will choose - not all photographers use the same techniques or even editing styles. 

2.) It will be awkward. Having someone tell you to pose or be candid is weird - bottom line. Having someone tell you to "kiss and hold the pose" will make you laugh. We have several amazing pictures of us laughing at each other trying to look "lovey" while struggling to not to fall off slippery rocks into the creek below. That being said, just roll with it. Digital cameras allow photographers to take a zillion pictures so who cares if they get a couple of "duds" or funny faces.

3.) Wear clothing you are comfortable in and shoes conducive for the terrain. My fiance had mesh topped shoes on and his feet got wet when we took pictures near the water. My boots were leather - and yes my feet were a bit wet as well. However, that is much better than trying to walk across wet rocks in pumps and dress shoes. We also ended up walking about half of the main trail to "follow the sun" and get the best pictures. I feel like my feet would have been near death if I had worn heels. If it looks like it might rain, purchase an umbrella just in case. The same holds true for jackets and sweaters; if it is cold you don't necessarily need to look bundled up at all times. Take a coat that you can wear between location shoots. I had on a leather vest that had to come off by the end of the shoot because I was so hot.

4.) Take a hairbrush and your makeup kit with you. I did not do this and I really wish I had. My hair is naturally very thin and wispy. It was so humid that day my hair just went everywhere about half way through the shoot. Furthermore I started the shoot out wearing a pink lip gloss. It gave me the perfect amount of color without overdoing it. But again, half way through the shoot it had faded and I looked washed out n a few photos. This can of course be corrected with photo editing software, but I was bummed that I looked so pale in a few great pictures. I was very pleased that I splurged and used L'Oreal Face Primer for the first time. I did not have to mess with my foundation or anything the whole shoot and we were out in the woods for almost 2 hours. Just a little bit of that stuff went a long way and it really did give me a "flawless" finish. I also felt like powder set better as well. I would use the product again. 

5.) In speaking of makeup, be mindful of the colors you choose. I have dark brown eyes so I usually have some wild color of eyeshadow on - green, blue, purple, two sometimes three colors. Yea. I wore my "usual" bright green eyeshadow and damn, it is green. Just - so - green. After I saw the pictures I thought to myself that it looked really out of place because it was "too done". It would have been okay if I was in a black cocktail dress but not walking in the park. I should have gone with a shimmery champagne or light brown to "match" the setting. Like I said before, this was a great trial run for me and at least now I know for the wedding I will need to go neutral with the eye, use fake lashes for subtle drama instead, and go with a long lasting lip stain instead of a gloss. I would not have been aware of any of this if I had not seen it in my engagement pictures. My fiance obviously did not have this problem - he wore a blue shirt to match his blue eyes and he looks great in all the pictures :)

6.) Do not be afraid to suggest a pose or ask your photographer to take a picture of something specific if it means something to you. My fiance and I have a habit of patting each other on the rear and making a joke on how it "ranks" with other pats. So, I asked our photographer to take a picture of us with his hand on my bum. I love the picture because you can see my ring, and it is a cute pic without being too crass. 

7.) Do not rely on, fret about, or go overboard on props. I know right now props are very popular: The Mr. and Mrs. signs, the metal or wood "&" sign, balloons, various banners with dates, chalkboard anything, pennants, etc. It seems like every engagement picture I have seen in the last three years features some kind of prop. I too was initially on board with props but I changed my mind. I was dead set on having something with our wedding date on it but I decided against it just in case for some reason we would need to change the date of our wedding or something in the future. After all, we had our engagement photos taken almost a year before the wedding. Additionally, the props will change in style or go away all together in the future - they are a fad - and fads ultimately date photographs. The same holds true for "themed photo shoots" (Great Gatsby anyone?) so I wanted something more timeless. 

8.) Be prepared if something weird happens. You might be wondering what this could possibly entail. Well...when we were having our pictures taken down by the water a group of women must have thought we were celebrities. As we were leaning on a tree trying not to fall into the White River, a group of three women stopped on the trail, pulled out their phones, and began recording us and taking pictures. They stood there for almost 10 minutes. It was so bizarre the photographer commented that she has never had this happen before. I am not suggesting something like this is common but be prepared to be approached by animals, get pooped on by a bird, step in mud up to your calf, have to wait for people to move or pass to get a shot in a "high traffic area", have people ask you what you are doing, etc. 

9.) Most importantly, have fun! Even if you are nervous, feel awkward, or have never had professional pictures taken before do not let your insecurities get the best of you in photos because it will show if you do. This can be combated by possibly doing a trial run with your fiance at home in your living room to get an idea of how you can pose together, try to mimic a picture you found on Pinterest, and do not make any "major changes" or wear uncomfortable clothes. If you do not usually wear a lot of makeup, do not go overboard. I say this because you will worry about how it looks the whole time and ultimately you will not look like yourself if you never wear makeup otherwise. You do not want to be unrecognizable in your own engagement photographs! I would also suggest wearing something you already own and you know you look good wearing. You don't want to buy a new blouse only to find out after the fact you can see through it when it is photographed or buy a sweater and wear the wrong bra that ends up showing a bunch lumps you never knew existed.

Bridal Show Tricks & Scams Plus the Good Stuff - My Personal Experience

Jacques Catering

Ever since I got engaged I have been online and on Facebook looking up bridal shows. My mother and I have already been to several both big and small and they really are a lot of fun. Bridal shows and expos are commonly held in the winter months during the slow wedding season to entice brides with goods and services they might need for their big day. They also bring people in to taste free samples of cake and catering, look at gowns and invitations, and OF COURSE register to win for prizes! Some of the prizes they give away are AMAZING! The big sponsored bridal shows often give away $2,000 worth of wedding rings, $4,000 honeymoons, $2500 for photography, etc. 

HOWEVER, there are a TON of scams and schemes associated with some of these contests and things you sign up for. Most of these scams come from the big, nationally known companies and no so much with local mom and pop shops - but it is beyond annoying when it happens. Below I have listed some issues I have experienced with filling out forms for prizes, making appointments, and going to "extras" - as well as some good experiences at the end! If you want to skip to the actual "good stuff" scroll down; my best experiences were with Jamberry Nail Art and Macy's Sip & Scan Registry Event.

Apple Brides

David's Bridal

Oh, dearest David's Bridal - The biggest/most well known national bridal shop. They have incensed me and I have not even set foot into the store yet! Okay, for one, David's Bridal called my house probably a month after I became engaged. I had not really been looking for dresses on any site other than Pinterest so I was not sure how they got my number. Who knows, I probably filled out something fleetingly while being engrossed in Bride Day on TLC. At any rate, they called and wanted me to set up an appointment. I already found my gown, so I said I was not interested in looking for a dress yet and that was that...

Until I actually made an appointment with them...

I attended the Hendrick's County Bridal Show and David's Bridal had a booth. I spoke to the attendant about bridesmaids dresses because that is something I need to get on NOW since my girls will need to get their dresses on their own, and I will probably not see them before the wedding. The attendant also gave me a coupon to use when I come in just in case I find a reception dress for myself or something my mother could wear. I thought this was great and it would give me an opportunity to look at different styles and compare prices. The day after the bridal show, DB sent me an e-mail confirming the appointment and everything and I thought that was that. Until the phone calls started....

On the Monday following the bridal show I started getting phone calls from a 1-800 number regarding my fiance and I winning a bridal meal package from Dinner 4 Two. Since the call back number was a 1-800, I just knew it was a scam. When I put the number into a Google search, it came back with a TON of complaints. Apparently, in Indiana at least, every time you sign up for ANYTHING WITH DAVID'S BRIDAL - you register online for coupons, you make an appointment in person or online or at a bridal show, you buy something from them, you enter a contest, etc. THEY SELL YOUR INFORMATION. In Indiana, they sell it to Midwest Lifestyle/Dinner 4 Two - it is one of those things where you sit through a demonstration and they try to get you to buy stuff. I looked this up on MULTIPLE sites and I am 100% positive there is a direct correlation between David's Bridal and this phone scam. 

They called the house CONSTANTLY and my mother finally called them back and told them to stop calling or they would be reported. I do not think they have called back since. It is not technically a scam, but it can lure young, unsuspecting brides into buying a bunch of junk thinking they will win something great at the end. On one of the online complaint sites, a young woman was "conned" into buying $500 worth of pots and pans thinking she would win a luxury cruise honeymoon only to find later she would need to attend more "demonstrations" to eventually get anything. This is the same kind of deal you run into with those timeshare demonstrations - they do give you prizes but the "big gift" always comes with a catch. For example, with the Dinner 4 Two, I read a review where a bride did go - she did receive free cookware, but to "win the honeymoon" she would have had to pay the taxes on it, get her own airfare, and go on a specific date. This specific "scam" irked me the most because they would not stop calling the house.

Mary Kay

Mary Kay Cosmetics

My next grumble is with Mary Kay Cosmetics. Mary Kay has had a booth at every single bridal show I have attended so far. I always stop to pick up whatever one-use sample they are handing out because that sample is usually eyeshadow and I LOVE eyeshadow - but I do not buy or use Mary Kay as part of my normal makeup routine. I have also provided my info to win free products but I had never received a call back. However, since I was one of the first people through the door to attend the the Indy Wedding Ideas sponsored bridal show this winter, I won a "secret prize" and that prize was with Mary Kay. I thought I might win a hand lotion or something like that, but I won a WHOPPING $75 gift certificate! I was pretty excited because I knew I could get a lot of eyeshadow for that or a really nice lotion. 

I spoke to both attendants and we looked at some product they had but I did not use my certificate then. I got their cards and figured I would e-mail them later if I wanted to order something. Well, the following weekend we spoke to another MK consultant who had these fliers for National Make Over Day. Apparently, Mary Kay does this every year and it was described to us as a day where thousands of women come and get make-overs for free.

Mary Kay

Well, the gift card I received had a specific consultants name on it - so I knew right then I would have to use the card through her. So, I sent her an e-mail and asked if she would be at the Makeover Day. Surprisingly, she said she would be there and it would be a "big, fun packed event", so I made an appointment. I figured I could at least redeem my gift card. Well, when we walked in - we were the only people in the room - well let me correct myself - we were the only people without a Mary Kay agenda in the room. They had all these trays with pea-sized dollops of various product and we were told to pick out a "makeover bag" that had sample sizes of products and a chart to follow for application.

The Pros:   I did like being able to try out different products like lotions and foundations.
                       It was sort of nice being the only people there, but it was a bit akward.
                       I did buy a lotion with my gift card and my mother got mascara and eyeshadow.
                       Our consultants were very nice and accommodating - they were not pushy with buying a product if we did not want it.

The Cons:  We were instructed to use exfoliant - which required us to SHARE A SINK in an adjacent hotel room - VERY awkward.
                      Our "make over" was self applied - we were provided with brushes and had to do it ourselves. This is not really my idea of a make-over.
                      It was awkward to be told there would be many females there and us be the only ones who came - there was a third consultant there that bought her sister and friend. But when we walked in we thought we were walking into a "buying scam" where you are harassed to buy product.

Overall, the "makeover experience" was fine, but not something I would have done if I had not won the gift card. THE BIGGEST PEEVE I had with all this was the "extra event" they wanted us to participate in the following Monday. When we first came in, they took before and then after pictures of "our makeovers". At the end of the event, they had us fill out a card on how well we thought it went, we were given a red raffle ticket, and asked to circle a product on this chart they gave us. This was not explained, and I did not know what this was for. I of course did not ask because I THOUGHT it was going to be a prize we could win based on the raffle ticket we were given. Instead, they took the charts back and the ticket and invited us to a second event where they promised prizes and a chance to win a $50 gift card. They also said this was what the before/after pictures were for. They said "all the photos from all the makeovers" would be there and we could vote on them and it would be a "big fun event for all the ladies who participated". I thought it would be another deal like the makeover day. BOY was I ever WRONG!

Card I received to invite us to the "Second Event"

On the Sunday before, I received several e-mails AND TEXT MESSAGES from the consultant we met with on Makeover Day to make sure we were coming. I said we were and I thought this would be a thing where we could walk in, vote on the photos, mill around, then leave. Nope! The thing started at 6:30 and we pulled into the venue at 6:45. Between 6:30-6:40 the consultant texted me wanting to know where we were...We walk in and it is a Mary Kay SALES PITCH - I should have known it was coming. We had to sit down to avoid being rude while they gave medals to sales consultants for like 20 minutes. We were then whisked into a room where the "regional manager" asked the small handful of guests if we wanted to become Mary Kay sellers too. This was why my consultant was so eager to get us to come - the more people Mary Kay hounds into becoming a consultant under them, the more likely they are to get a company car for free. Oh and the photos we were to vote on - there were only like 10 of them in the back of the room and the "voting" would not commence until after the guests listened to all the speeches.

This whole spiel was designed to keep us there from 6:30-8:30. My fiance was working late and I needed to get back to make him some dinner and my mother had to cancel an appointment to attend this with me. Had we known this was what it truly was, we would have NEVER gone. When I got home I looked this up online, and like the mess with David's Bridal selling information, it is apparently well known that these Mary Kay people do this kind of thing all the time. Some consultants it seems are WAY better than others, but if you get stuck with a dud of a consultant, you will have a bad time. I read on a forum about how one consultant basically held a group of bridesmaids hostage until someone bought something because the consultant rented a conference room on her own dime and "expected a rate of return". Another thing I noticed in the complaint forums is that many brides had the misconception that MARY KAY SELLERS ARE MAKEUP ARTISTS. They ARE NOT makeup artists! At the end of the night I sent an e-mail to the consultant explaining why we had to cut out early and she apologized for not explaining that it was a 100% sales pitch. I have not heard from her since, but she was a very nice person and I do understand that most Mary Kay sellers are stay-at-home moms who use the business to be able to work from home. Some of their products are very nice quality - however I would just order online if you wish to buy because the mark up IS FIFTY PERCENT if you buy from a consultant directly!

Stella & Dot

Stella & Dot

I knew about Stella & Dot long before I started attending bridal shows. I actually own some S&D jewelry that I have purchased second hand from garage sales. The problem with S&D is that like Mary Kay, it is a sales pitch where they try and get you to host "house parties" to basically coerce your friends and family into purchasing pretty, albeit expensive costume jewelry. Their jewelry is cute I will give them that, but just order it online. DO NOT get involved with a consultant at a bridal show unless you really want to do these parties because the E-MAILS WILL NOT STOP. I swear, I was getting 2-3 e-mails a week about selling and specials until I put them on the spam list. 

Photography Cameras

Various Photographers

Some photographers you meet once at a bridal show, you take their card, and never hear from them again. Others, you fill out a contest or something and they send you a courtesy "remember me?" e-mail, then that is it. Then there are others that use the contest you filled out for to bombard you with adverts, "coupons", or notices that you "won something." The first one of these I got I was so excited because I actually thought I won something. I got an e-mail saying I won a free engagement session. This was something I wanted but we did not budget for nor think was totally necessary. Engagement sessions are very expensive if you get them ala carte from a different photographer than who you will be using for your wedding - between $250-$500 usually. Most of the contests you sign up for with photographers at bridal expos are for "free" engagement sessions or boudoir photos. Well, the engagement session I won was just for the sitting - we would have to fork over $300 for the digital release and this did not include prints. Come to find out, this is how almost all of these photographer contests work - you really get nothing unless you book them for your wedding. I also had to fish for this information through several e-mails, and once they spilled the beans on how this all really worked, I never heard from them again. Since then I have "won", free Save the Date's with the purchase of a sitting (the time you still have to pay BY THE HOUR was in the fine print), "print credits" for boudoir shoots (but you have to pay for the glam up session and the sitting), a "deep discount" on either an engagement or boudoir session (the SAME discount was available in Groupon). You get the idea...

Jamberry Nails

Jamberry Nails

Okay, I must admit, this was fun! Jamberry Nails is just another one of those companies that sells "finger nail stickers". Yes, this is all they are. You can get them at Target, Walgreen's, CVS under various name brands, you can get them from artists on Etsy, or you can get them from specific companies like Jamberry. Again, like with Stella & Dot, if you want it, order it online and do not get wrapped up into a sales pitch about hosting a party unless you really want to. At the Hendricks County Bridal Show there were several young girls at a Jamberry booth that were really fun and they helped put a sticker on my nail. If you do these yourself, you will need help because it is somewhat of a process. But, they are really different and cute! I will probably get some of these from somewhere to include with my bridesmaids gifts since you can get them customized! Furthermore, these run between $8-$15 a set depending on where you order them from and one kit will do fingernails and your toes too! Luckily, I was not bombarded with any e-mails or phone calls from this company - but if you are it will be because they want you to host a house party. The fact that the vendor attendants were so helpful in explaining the product to me was what made me more interested in their product overall.

Wedding Bee

Macy's Sip & Scan

After the disappointing session with Mary Kay I was actually dreading the Macy's Sip & Scan event I signed up for in January. I thought to myself, oh no, this will be another sales pitch, or a thing to get me to sign up for a Macy's credit card, or something ridiculous. I signed up for this event at the first bridal show I ever attended and I had forgotten about it until I received a confirmation e-mail. The reason I signed up for it was because I was clueless about wedding registries and Macy's was not a store I would have ever considered signing up for since I only shop there at Christmas. My fiance was working late so I took my mom with me. I must admit, this was a TOTAL BLAST! It was simple too! You go in, they give you a scanner and a check list sheet, and tell you to have at it! They had a caterer passing out hors d'oeuvres and drinks, a DJ for the whole second floor, and they had like 10 consultants there to help you. They were ALL very knowledgeable and helpful and there were about 8 couples there to boot. It was so unexpected!

I scanned a TON of stuff I never thought I would need - but that in fact I would need. Like a hand mixer, an iron, a set of skillets, plates for Thankgiving, a new comforter, etc. They THEN tell you to have guests who will ultimately buying you a gift to wait until they get coupons in the mail/paper because they can stack coupons with the discount they already get for scanning the registry. Basically, your guests will be able to get you more for less money since there are discounts you can "stack" with the registry. They also gave me a TON of coupons I can use now, a $25 Restaurant.com gift card, a booklet with all this other information. It was really helpful! AND YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BUY ANYTHING. There is NO CATCH! I was actually so impressed that I plan on returning to the store probably several times to look at more items to add. Since my wedding is so far out, one of the attendants told me I can add clothing to my registry, then scan my own registry at the store, and get an extra percentage off on MY OWN PURCHASES. My mom can do this too. I was like WOW, and proceeded to scan 3 boxes of Kuerig cups so when the coupons come out in the mail, I can get more of a discount! There are actually so many perks to having a Macy's registry you, as a bride, would be foolish not to check it out. YOU CAN EVEN SCAN FURNITURE AND RUGS! You can scan lingerie for your bachelorette party, kitchen basics for your housewarming party, toasting glasses and serving items for your engagement party, pilsner and shot glasses for groomsmen gifts, etc. And the registry is good for quite some time after your wedding as well so you can purchase whatever extras you might need. It was so cool, I was really happy I attended. But again, this is something I would have never known about if it had not been at a bridal show.

The Verdict:

If you receive an offer at a bridal show GOOGLE IT! Odds are, if it is scammy in any way whatsoever, there will be a zillion posts about it somewhere. You can find complaints on most bridal sites as well or other blogs with posts dedicated to specific "scams". BUT, not everything is a scam or con! Like I initially stated, most contests sponsored by local "mom & pop" shops are legitimate and do not come with any sort of catch. Bakers are a great example. If you win a $100 cake - you win a $100 cake. A local bridal shop recently gave away a $600 gown - which could have been a wedding dress, mother of the bride dress, etc. as long as it was under $600 in store. A local restaurant gave away a rehearsal dinner for up to 20 people. Most of the contests you register for are legitimate, just be aware that some come with "catches" or might end up being total scams.